Strange days and strange fixations on odd, kitsch but also dark things. Why do we like or feel like we can’t take our eyes off some kinds of things,? I’ve been wondering for years why do I keep thinking of some elements of a book by Oe Kenzaburo (Man'en gannen no futtoboru, 1967...i have no idea of the title in English. in spanish it's translated into something very different, as El grito silencioso) that inspired darkness and madness to me. I don’t drink alcohol because of several reasons (philosophical basically) and sometimes, seeing people drinking and certain attitudes towards drinking, besides thinking of the ideas that brought me to take such a decision, I think of some character in that novel by Oe. That character, morally a bit odd, repeated over and over, that one must face life being sober. Those words pop in my mind from time to time, normally together with images I mentally created when I read that book. I didn’t like that book but it’s present in my mind, and now I’m reading another novel by Oe Kenzaburo, (Memushiri kouchi, 1958, in Spanish: Arrancad las semillas, fusilad a los niños) which shares some points with the one I mentioned, but which I feel is less negative.
Another negative thing I keep in mind is the cover of some cd (Wrath of the Tyrant) by the black metal band Emperor . Dark cover (but not such much) with some element I don’t know which attracts my attention. Maybe the colours, the hair of the man/woman that a certain point becomes snake, the eyes. Who knows? I guess we all have some dark or, at least, hidden side that makes us pay attention to things we don’t really consider positive for us, thinks that our subconsciousness seems to like more than ourselves (I’m not talking about universal moral values nor crimes...i’m not talking about scatological things, nor wicked things...i leave them for the news on tv and the yellow press and so on, because reality is worse than the worse and most macabre black metal lyrics). Fortunately it’s just the cover of that cd that I think has something interesting somewhere, somehow (I’ve just listened to their song “curse you all the men” and I don’t agree with their “black” ideas...though they seem to be more moderated nowadays and they don’t burn any more churches, fortunately). But there are more so-called/considered normal people who listen to this sub-genre within metal...like a guy on a train wearing a t-shirt of Opeth, another metal band....peaceful face and attitude on his way back home. (curiously, his wearing that t-shirt and his kind expression made me feel safer on the train and I didn’t sit very far from him...i thought and felt that better close to that guy, which didn’t seem to be that strange---at least I knew his musical taste--- than close to some of those weird/wicked men in trains in the evening)
On the other side, there come kitsch things and people, like Zlad!, an Australian creation (Molvanîa doesn’t exist, of course!!!) singing things whose lyrics have verses like the one in the title of this post. There also something lying beneath such kitsch creatures wearing silver clothes and wacky hair styles...i guess i like people displaying freedom, colours. i guess i can't help liking surrealism. And those dark and kitsch fixations are like my spontaneous dreams.
But I and my brain remain on a middle path, a middle point. Somewhere where bright sides and darker or hidden sides keep balanced. And these days i'm focusing on the way i breath, pathing a rhythm and some depth, like that of feet on the shore of some imaginary beach.
Another negative thing I keep in mind is the cover of some cd (Wrath of the Tyrant) by the black metal band Emperor . Dark cover (but not such much) with some element I don’t know which attracts my attention. Maybe the colours, the hair of the man/woman that a certain point becomes snake, the eyes. Who knows? I guess we all have some dark or, at least, hidden side that makes us pay attention to things we don’t really consider positive for us, thinks that our subconsciousness seems to like more than ourselves (I’m not talking about universal moral values nor crimes...i’m not talking about scatological things, nor wicked things...i leave them for the news on tv and the yellow press and so on, because reality is worse than the worse and most macabre black metal lyrics). Fortunately it’s just the cover of that cd that I think has something interesting somewhere, somehow (I’ve just listened to their song “curse you all the men” and I don’t agree with their “black” ideas...though they seem to be more moderated nowadays and they don’t burn any more churches, fortunately). But there are more so-called/considered normal people who listen to this sub-genre within metal...like a guy on a train wearing a t-shirt of Opeth, another metal band....peaceful face and attitude on his way back home. (curiously, his wearing that t-shirt and his kind expression made me feel safer on the train and I didn’t sit very far from him...i thought and felt that better close to that guy, which didn’t seem to be that strange---at least I knew his musical taste--- than close to some of those weird/wicked men in trains in the evening)
On the other side, there come kitsch things and people, like Zlad!, an Australian creation (Molvanîa doesn’t exist, of course!!!) singing things whose lyrics have verses like the one in the title of this post. There also something lying beneath such kitsch creatures wearing silver clothes and wacky hair styles...i guess i like people displaying freedom, colours. i guess i can't help liking surrealism. And those dark and kitsch fixations are like my spontaneous dreams.
But I and my brain remain on a middle path, a middle point. Somewhere where bright sides and darker or hidden sides keep balanced. And these days i'm focusing on the way i breath, pathing a rhythm and some depth, like that of feet on the shore of some imaginary beach.
2 comments:
waaahh... pengen banget ke spanyol, trus langsung ke amerika latin! kapan kah uang-uang itu akan mampir ke dompetku??? =)
thanks arief for the translation!!!! and terima kasih to the one who enriched the post with a comment in indonesian. by the waaaaay, Arief...i'll write you back soon...many things on my head. :) do take care.
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